New Moan: The First Book in the Twishite Saga : A Parody

New Moan: The First Book in the Twishite Saga : A Parody by Mayo, Stephfordy. paperback edition. ISBN: 9781843174844.

Plenty of overwrought prose and melodramatic angst mark this fang-sharp parody of number-one New York Times-bestseller New Moon "I want to bite you, Heffa. I want to bite you very hard. Ill be gentle, I promise. If you really loved me, youd let me." Heffa Lump is just a typical pale 17-year-old who doubts that anyone will ever see her true beauty and needs to grow up and get a life. Fortunately, the Spatula Academy of Fictional Excellence specializes in helping characters from kids€™ books cross over into adult fiction. Unfortunately, she€™s distracted from her attempts to leave adolescence behind when she meets Teddy Kelledy—an impossibly gorgeous boy who eats rare meat, is super-strong, and never goes out in daylight. Could he—just maybe—be a vampire? (Hint: totally.) Soon, Heffa finds herself harassed